This morning I was thinking of a post I saw last night, it read:
"2022 taught me to stop aspiring to sit at tables where I have to bring my own chair, squeeze in between folks, and repeatedly convince others why I should be there. I learned to build a new table. I hope you learned the same."
It really touched me.
In 2022 I found paths of healing that led me back to my art, that lead me away from abuse and unsafe situations with extended family, that lead me into more birth spaces with deeper and more profound intention than ever before.
I am starting 2023 with a lot of peace. A lot of rest in my own company. Peace over building new traditions while protecting the space I am in with my family, with birth clients, and on my own.
2022 brought me so much growth, so much ascension. I reconnected with animals, and my love for them. With my inner child, and my love for reading. I have reconnected to my body and spirit in ways that allows me to recognize and honor my needs, and make friends with hope again through grief.
2023 there is no room for compromising my own happiness or safety or comfort to make others like me or accept me. I am going to say no authentically, so I don't say yes resentfully. I don't do goals, I do intentions. I don't set resolutions, but I do fully absorb the lessons and feelings that have lifted me into this next season and year. I feel light, I have space, and I am just feeling so good today. The last few years have been better and better, as I learned so many important lessons and created paths toawrds healing. Knowing that I can live and exist this way, makes me so excited to keep living. A feeling I have struggled against before.
In this beautiful thriving business I have learned the art of manifestation, faith, hope, trust in self, and essentially- I have been building a table. A strong, artful table. The biggest table. This is my table. This work, this energy, this space. I release the feelings of fear that come from places of lack, and I keep building. keep carving small sparkles and leaves and flowers into the corners of the wood. This imagery for me, calls up my grandfathers wood shop, an ethereal place when I was younger with big machines and artwork everywhere. Round pieces of wood in the process of becoming clocks. Saw dust covered my feet and I can smell the air even now. Such a good smell. Such a strong memory. I hope that this table I am building, can give that feeling to others.
This is my table. You are welcome here. In fact, I'll make you a custom chair, and brush your hair, and honor your journey while you sit with me. I will feed you and connect with you and help you connect to everything you need for this next part, this next journey you are to embark upon.
While I serve, and create, I am thriving in this energy. There is a circular flow of ever moving, ever giving energy and love in this space. It is pouring back into me, and I just know I am going to meet some amazing people here this year. <3
Come sit with me, the tea is warm and I want to hold space with you.
- Your Wildwood Birthkeeper